Something in the Water…

There is an epidemic going around. And no, I am not talking about the contaminated ground turkey; I’m talking about the increasingly amount of women willing to be “side chicks.” As I observed relationships around me, I noticed a disturbing pattern; women I knew were settling for being the girl on the side. What possesses a woman to be a side chick?

First, let me define side chick/dude (as not to be gender biased) so that we are on the same page. For these purposes, a  side chick/dude  is a person romantically involved with someone who is in a committed relationship with someone else. I use the term “committed” loosely, obviously.

I asked those close to me their opinions on the subject. As far as what motivates a person to assume side chick/dude status, responses ranged from self-esteem issues to a solution to boredom. While I agree that there are numerous reasons for a person to assume the role of side chick/dude, I contend against any of those reasons as being just.

My issues with side chicks:

1. Side chicks have no respect for the main girl. If I hear another woman say that the responsibity lies with the man and that it is his decision if he wants to cheat, I am going to SCREAM! She is only making excuses and passing the blame and guilt onto someone else. I am a firm believer that the bad karma you put out into the world comes back to you (former cheater talking here). So side chicks be warned!

2. Side chicks have no respect for themselves. Now, I know that a lot of you disagree with this statement; however, I stand by it. Anyone willing to fulfill another’s sexual desires without any formal committment (The ultimate committment being marriage, of course. You know I had to throw that in, lol.) is selling himself/herself short. Point blank.

Matthew 7: 6 says, “Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearl to pigs.” Which is exactly what you do as a side chick. It goes on to say, “If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and then turn and tear you to pieces.” In other words, the dogs and pigs you give your pearls to will not fully appreciate and value them. Which brings me to my next question:  Can a guy truly respect a side chick?

The answer to this question initally shocked me. I noticed that two guy friends of mine made former side chicks their main girls. So then I began to wonder. Did I have it all wrong? Was being the side chick the way to go?

So I asked one of the guys did he/could he fully respect his girl seeing as she started off as the side chick. His response:  “How can I respect a girl who doesn’t respect herself enough not to be a** on the side?”

And true to his words, the former side chick turned main chick soon found him with a new side chick. And she was actually surprised and upset. Really?

-Belle