Wishing On A Star

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Turning Pain Into Laughter Since 2011

A few months ago I wrote a blog stating my views on marriage.  I got a lot of feedback, mostly negative.  Which is fine, if you’re going to dish it you got to be able to take it right?  Well, after having a discussion with one of my friend’s mom, I came to the conclusion that I am definitely in the minority when it comes to my views on marriage.  My friend’s mom stated, “Girl you have issues.  It’s every little girls dream to get married.  Every woman has been planning her wedding since she was a kid.”  1001-little-boy-proposing-to-little-girl_weI beg to differ.  When I was younger I never had dreams of getting married nor had fake weddings like many little girls do.  I guess I wasn’t the average little girl.  I mean, aren’t there better things to do when you’re a kid?  Like make mud pies and take things apart to see how they work…that’s how I spent my childhood.  As a child, you have no idea what you’re doing when you set out to plan your wedding.  All you know is that you want a pretty dress that makes you look like a princess.  You don’t even think about the husband and the actual marriage.  I think even today, most adults don’t think about the marriage because they are too busy planning the wedding.

As much as I would like to believe that I’m not the only one that didn’t have childhood dreams of getting married, it seems that I am always in the minority on most issues.  So my curious little mind did a little probing to find out just how many people have their dream weddings all planned out and just how long those plans have been in place:

 Honestly, I didn’t really have those dreams when I was younger…when I hit 30, I started wondering what a life with someone would be like…now that I’m 35 and a single mother I look at life a lot differently, because my priorities are to my kids first.  I believe that if God has that person for me, He’ll send him in His time, not mine. ~L.L.

 I didn’t dream of getting married, having a wedding, or having kids as a child, which now leads me to believe that adults who dreamed of getting married when they were kids are either married or have been married before. They tend to get married young, in their twenties. Those who dreamed of marriage as a kid, end up making it their priority, while those of us who were not mesmerized by it as a kid don’t make it a priority. ~Y.S.

 I don’t know if I really agree with this statement because I really didn’t think about weddings (not marriage, but weddings) until my early twenties.  And that is mainly because I started watching Say Yes to the Dress on TLC.  As far as marriage goes, I’ve only recently been obsessing about that and that’s because I’m dating someone that I would like to make me a wife one day.  But I definitely still have some growing and maturing to do before I even consider that.  I’m still trying to figure myself out as a single woman! ~M.R.

 I don’t think every little girl grows up dreaming of getting married.  In today’s society most women have an independent mindset and feel that they can do everything on their own, even have a baby without a man, LOL.  A lot of single women bring up their daughters to have this same mindset.  I consider myself to be very independent but I definitely want to get married one day.  I was one of those girls that grew up dreaming of my wedding day.  Heck I still do.  I think marriage is one the most beautiful things that God created when it is done in the right context.  Committing your entire life to just one person is so deep and amazing to me and I can’t wait to be committed to someone through marriage one day! ~A.G.

Well, Well, Well…it looks like I’m not alone this time, with the exception of A.G.  YES!  I finally have some followers.  Thank God!  I was starting to think I was an ODDBALL! (no comments please)  My friend’s mom says I have “daddy issues.”  I’m sure I do have a few “daddy issues” because my father was not active in my life.  But I do not believe that is the reason for my marriage issues.  I have no problem being committed to someone…one day.  But I just cannot see myself getting married.  I don’t believe everyone was meant to be married.  And I believe I am one of those people.  Whenever I tell someone that, their response is usually, “Awwww!”  Why feel sorry for someone who says they don’t want to get married?  Is that the ultimate goal in life…graduate high school and get married?  Hmmmm, I hope not.  There has to more to life than marriage, even though some women think of nothing more than finding a husband.  I have a few Pinterest followers that do nothing but pin wedding dresses, reception décor, engagement rings, and bridesmaid dresses.  How about pinning some recipes or some new DIY projects so I can repin them and try them when I get bored from not having a husband. 😉

marriage-vs-wedding Reality is, not everyone is going to find their prince charming.  One reason for that is most women focus on the wedding more than the actual marriage.  They spend less time making sure the man they’ve decided to marry is the man God wants them to marry, and more time worrying about finding the perfect dress, the perfect flowers, the perfect venue, and anything else that will make this day “perfect.”  Do I have any facts to back up what I’m saying? Nope, sure don’t.  This is just my opinion, what I’m feeling.  I’m in no way saying put aside your dreams of finding a husband and planning a wedding.  But, just be sure to focus more on the marriage and less on the wedding.

Until Next Time Laughers…Keep Laughing!

~Kitta

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Markitta-1021Kitta, a native of Jackson, TN, is a Laugh Coach, blogger and co-founder of Can I Laugh Now? This Traveling Media Personality is a graduate of the University of Memphis, where she earned her degree in Criminology and Criminal Justice.  Kitta believes in spreading joy, one laugh at a time.

Steele Pretty – DJ Traci Steele

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Turning Pain Into Laughter Since 2011

I recently had the opportunity to meet Love and Hip Hop Atlanta’s DJ Traci Steele.  I’ve been a fan of Traci’s long before Love and Hip Hop, she’s actually the reason I watched season 2 (I didn’t watch not one episode of the first season, sorry Mona Scott). I happily followed her and Drew’s storyline, shocked that two people who were once in a relationship and now have a child together could get along so well, most of the time…not your typical baby mama/baby daddy antics.  And I totally think they should be together! But that’s just my “outside looking in” opinion, so I’ll say no more.  I always said that if she was hosting a party near me I would go.  Well, I finally had the opportunity. tracifullinterview-1367443884

It’s Saturday night and I had just come home from having dinner with my mom.  I was relaxing on the couch in my PJs because, unfortunately, there’s not much going on in my city on a Saturday night.  So I began to do my usual, scroll down my Instagram timeline, and I see a post by Traci Steele, “Memphis I’m here, come party with me tonight.”  Now I’m usually not a very spontaneous person, even though my fun-loving and energetic personality may suggest otherwise ;-).  So I call up my girls, who are also in their PJs (don’t judge us) and convince them to make the hour drive to Memphis to see my favorite DJ and Love and Hip Hop star.  We get all cute and hit the road, excited to have a very overdue night of fun.  When we arrive at the venue there is absolutely no one there.  Well, I take that back, security is standing outside parking lot pimpin.  So we sit there in hopes that people will soon start pulling in and filling up the club.  Surely if we drove an hour, the locals will come out too.

After sitting there for about 20 minutes, a truck pulls up and Traci and her assistant hop out.  She immediately starts taking pictures with security and the other employees before she enters the club.  Now keep in mind, during that 20 minutes no one else has arrived at the club, so we’re still hesitant about going in.  My first thought was that Traci would leave because no one showed up.  But after driving an hour I was at least going to get the opportunity to meet someone that I am a fan of, so we decide to go in…besides the employees the club was COMPLETELY EMPTY!

As we sit there waiting for Traci to set up and do her thing, I couldn’t help but wonder why no one came out.  I couldn’t believe this club was empty and it was well after midnight so it should be standing room only in this place by now.  And I couldn’t imaging how she felt or what she was thinking.  Well, she was thinking that she’s going to do her thing regardless. In her words, “4 people or 400 we gon get it in”…and we were ready to get it in with her.

This night made me an even bigger fan than I was before.  She keep the party going for well over 2 hours.  It’s like we had our own private party with DJ Traci Steele and we LOVED IT!  Not only did she entertain us, she wobbled with us (if you don’t know what the wobble is YouTube it), we had a mini photo shoot, and she gave us each lip gloss from her new line.  WE HAD A BLAST! Now let me just say that the club wasn’t empty because Memphis doesn’t love Traci Steele, that club was empty because of bad promotion.  The next day when Facebook and Instagram saw my pics, I received so many messages saying they knew nothing about her coming to town, and if they had they definitely would have been there.  Shame on the promoters because the people of Memphis really missed out.

Why am I a fan of Traci Steele? She is a go getta! I admire her drive and work ethic…she is the business woman I aspire to be.  She makes smart moves…from being a DJ to owning properties to launching her own lip gloss line, she has multiple streams of income and building her empire through hard work.  And she is just as nice, humble, and fun as she appears to be on TV.  It’s disturbing to see all the hate and negativity that comes her way via social media.  We have to do better at supporting people who are displaying a positive image and stop glorifying those that will do ANY and EVERYTHING to get attention.  Traci Steele is a business woman, entrepreneur, mother and all around good person.  And to keep it real, some of you have no room to talk negatively about anyone.  Step your game up and stop trying to tear others down just to make your own pathetic life and lackluster appearance look better than it actually is. Traci Steele is just as beautiful in person and she’s super nice! No matter how many names you call her or how often you try to discredit her, she’s Steele Pretty!

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Don’t ask me why I’m looking like this

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This one is much better!

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Steele Pretty Lip Gloss in Haute

Until next time Laughers…Keep Laughing!

~Kitta

Follow me: Twitter
Like me: Facebook
Share my world: Instagram
Laugh with me: YouTube

new kitta photoKitta, a native of Jackson, TN, is a Laugh Coach, blogger and co-founder of Can I Laugh Now? This Traveling Media Personality is a graduate of the University of Memphis, where she earned her degree in Criminology and Criminal Justice.  Kitta believes in spreading joy, one laugh at a time.